So, I officially had my first experience of passing straight out, face down, in the middle of my books! I don't know when it happened, but I was reading, and then all of a sudden it was hours later. Maybe I'm a little tired!
Did I mention there's a lot of reading to this thing!
I officially need a break (I know, I know, I just got started), so let's talk about something else for a bit. This weekend I had the pleasure of having my older sister, Queen Godis, visit with me. Since I refuse to be all nerd and no play, I took the liberty to have FUN! We kicked the weekend off with a little sunbathing, courtesy of the fabulous rooftop pool at my residence, and then hit the town of DC.
During this extravaganza, thanks to my sister, I met some pretty amazing friends and fellow DMV residents. On Saturday, we hung out in Columbia Heights and then ventured over to Adams Morgan for crepes and to peruse some of the local shops. On Sunday, we returned to Columbia Heights for a phenomenal brunch prepared by a sister whose poetic proficiency showed up everywhere, from the colorful decor of her home to the way she created magic with organic ingredients! Can you say scrumptious! What I found particularly delicious, however, was the way that one woman's kindness created a space for sisters to gather and celebrate the tremendous blessing of being sisters, biological and otherwise.
After filling our bellies with food and laughter, we headed over to Malcolm X park to participate in the traditional Drum Circle. The dancing and rhythmic honoring of our ancestors through the collaboration of instruments transported me to a world that .... almost made me forget that I had mounds of work waiting for me at home. Instead of leaving, though, I reminded myself that I committed to having a balanced life on this journey that included fun and experiences outside of my academic program. So I stayed, danced some more with my sister, friends, and cousins and then .... went to the movies. The 12:15AM showing of Eat, Pray, Love. I know I was pushing it, but I wanted to really seize the moment of having my sister here and spend as much quality time with her as I could. It was well worth every last second.
A couple of things from the movie reminded me of the importance of taking time to have fun and enjoy life. Although I have chosen to be in a rigorous academic program, and must make adjustments to incorporate the "what it takes" to successfully complete Howard, I also acknowledge that this is my life. In all that I do, I choose to be balanced, so along this journey I am comfortable knowing that this will include being diligent with work, having fun with great people, and sometimes just enjoying "dulce far niente", the sweetness of doing nothing!
.....but for now, BACK TO WORK!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Planting the Seeds of Commitment and Completion
During my first day of class this past Tuesday the professor talked about the type of diligence it takes to make it through this level of academia. As she rattled off a list of qualities that might render you out of your league, I made mental notes of all of the personal characteristics that I have that weren't necessarily fitting in with the "what it takes". If I'm being honest, reading for school is not my favorite past-time, I am not known to be on time, I procrastinate, and I haven't really been the self-starter. I get lazy and looove to sleep. (For those of you who might want to encourage me right now by recalling all of the ways you've known me to be opposite of what I'm describing, save yourself the trouble. I've been fooling you too).
No worries, I am NOT feeling inadequate. I am just taking an honest look at who I've been in my life so that I can prepare for where I'm going. As the professor continued yesterday with the lesson/introduction to the course, I actually noticed that I wasn't distracted, daydreaming, or thinking about lunch or the nearest exit out of the program. I was very engaged and stimulated by the conversation about what I can get, and give, to this program, to the profession, and to the community. I got excited, and I noticed my transformation beginning.
On Wednesday morning, the very same person who doesn't like to get up early or read extensive academic material, got up at 5 am, no alarm, and began my day. Now, when my eyes first opened and I looked at the clock, I did initially think "what is this, a trick?" (phrase courtesy of L.Miner), but then I asked myself, "who am I going to be in this process?" So, at 5 am, I got up and took care of business. I did some reading, and prepared myself to get to campus to take care of outstanding things from my "to-do" list. Once there, I took care of my medical hold (I HATE NEEDLES), visited the campus library, and took a tour of the school museum. I printed reading material and basically got myself organized to get things done.
Today, as I sat for my second day of classes, I was still driven by the same momentum. I had to pinch myself at one point because I felt I might have been making strange gazes at the professors; I was just so happy to be sitting across from Professors, black, female, PhDs, who are my reflection. In my History & Philosophy of Social Welfare class, as my professor spoke, I felt as if I was transported to a porch in the South and sitting at the knee of a relative who was sharing old stories about our heritage. For the entire six hours of classes today, I was really in it.
I won't lie and act like there weren't times during the day when I had to quiet the voice inside my brain that kept analyzing EVERYTHING I said, but as I acknowledge it, I also release the strongholds of my self-doubt.
When I came home, I was perusing facebook and this video caught my attention. http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1524731795634 (Please pause and watch)
This spoke very directly to me. It reinforced the discussion I had with myself about who I'm going to be in this process.
Right now, as I sit amongst my books and planner on the floor of my bare living room (I still haven't furnished yet, don't judge me!), I know that I'm committed to being a contribution. I "[will not] let my dreams fall asleep" - (John Banzai and Les Nubian).
Stay tuned......
No worries, I am NOT feeling inadequate. I am just taking an honest look at who I've been in my life so that I can prepare for where I'm going. As the professor continued yesterday with the lesson/introduction to the course, I actually noticed that I wasn't distracted, daydreaming, or thinking about lunch or the nearest exit out of the program. I was very engaged and stimulated by the conversation about what I can get, and give, to this program, to the profession, and to the community. I got excited, and I noticed my transformation beginning.
On Wednesday morning, the very same person who doesn't like to get up early or read extensive academic material, got up at 5 am, no alarm, and began my day. Now, when my eyes first opened and I looked at the clock, I did initially think "what is this, a trick?" (phrase courtesy of L.Miner), but then I asked myself, "who am I going to be in this process?" So, at 5 am, I got up and took care of business. I did some reading, and prepared myself to get to campus to take care of outstanding things from my "to-do" list. Once there, I took care of my medical hold (I HATE NEEDLES), visited the campus library, and took a tour of the school museum. I printed reading material and basically got myself organized to get things done.
Today, as I sat for my second day of classes, I was still driven by the same momentum. I had to pinch myself at one point because I felt I might have been making strange gazes at the professors; I was just so happy to be sitting across from Professors, black, female, PhDs, who are my reflection. In my History & Philosophy of Social Welfare class, as my professor spoke, I felt as if I was transported to a porch in the South and sitting at the knee of a relative who was sharing old stories about our heritage. For the entire six hours of classes today, I was really in it.
I won't lie and act like there weren't times during the day when I had to quiet the voice inside my brain that kept analyzing EVERYTHING I said, but as I acknowledge it, I also release the strongholds of my self-doubt.
When I came home, I was perusing facebook and this video caught my attention. http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1524731795634 (Please pause and watch)
This spoke very directly to me. It reinforced the discussion I had with myself about who I'm going to be in this process.
Right now, as I sit amongst my books and planner on the floor of my bare living room (I still haven't furnished yet, don't judge me!), I know that I'm committed to being a contribution. I "[will not] let my dreams fall asleep" - (John Banzai and Les Nubian).
Stay tuned......
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
My First Day of School!
In May 2005, I took an oath (to myself) that I would never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ( say it like Chris Tucker) go back to school AGAIN! August 24, 2010... here I go again, and this time it's the big one!
So, here I am, fresh out of my first day of class as a PhD student at Howard University...I have an intense pressure headache in the middle of my forehead, and I'm ready for nite nite! Did I mention, I only had one class today!
Nonetheless, I am very excited. I boldly took on this adventure during the winter of 2009 when I set out to write and revise (and revise and revise) my personal statement. Stepping out purely on faith I submitted my application, and took my GRE's, on the absolute last day possible to get everything in ... and then I waited.
In July of 2010, it all came together. While in my cousin's car, after driving around DC and Maryland for hours trying to find a place to live, I got the phone call from school informing me that I would receive full tuition and a stipend enough to live in the Maryland apartment of my dreams (the very one that I am typing this blog from right now). It was as if I scripted and starred in the entire thing myself; well, in my prayer journal, I actually did. God directed the whole production.
So, here I am. This first entry is going to be short and to the point (practice for how we have to write in school) because I want to get a head start on some homework - yes, homework already. But I am truly excited about school and taking on this endeavor of chronicling this process.
As my professor for Social Work Research methods reviewed the syllabus today, I was really enthused about the possibility of learning in a way that I haven't before. I got inspired by the thought of being able to critically examine things, and by the possibility of becoming an expert in the Social Work field that could truly make the difference I've been yearning to make in my 9 - 5s for the past five years. I grew thrilled by the vision of being able to sit at the head of a class someday with the privilege of educating others. I am definitely back in the game ... AND I'M READY!
My notes for the day:
Remember who I am, and WHOSE I AM!
This is not about letter grades and people pleasing, this is about personal, intellectual, and professional growth BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY!
I can create the possibility of greatness and just BE.
Take care of myself mentally, physically, and spiritually!
Believe in the power of my voice and know that I have something to say.
I AM A POWERFUL CONTRIBUTION!
Let's get it on!
Stay tuned....
Oh, btw - don't look for a grammatically perfect blog. This is my free space to just be self-expressed, so ... don't judge me. I'll get enough of that in school!
Thanks!
Smooches
So, here I am, fresh out of my first day of class as a PhD student at Howard University...I have an intense pressure headache in the middle of my forehead, and I'm ready for nite nite! Did I mention, I only had one class today!
Nonetheless, I am very excited. I boldly took on this adventure during the winter of 2009 when I set out to write and revise (and revise and revise) my personal statement. Stepping out purely on faith I submitted my application, and took my GRE's, on the absolute last day possible to get everything in ... and then I waited.
In July of 2010, it all came together. While in my cousin's car, after driving around DC and Maryland for hours trying to find a place to live, I got the phone call from school informing me that I would receive full tuition and a stipend enough to live in the Maryland apartment of my dreams (the very one that I am typing this blog from right now). It was as if I scripted and starred in the entire thing myself; well, in my prayer journal, I actually did. God directed the whole production.
So, here I am. This first entry is going to be short and to the point (practice for how we have to write in school) because I want to get a head start on some homework - yes, homework already. But I am truly excited about school and taking on this endeavor of chronicling this process.
As my professor for Social Work Research methods reviewed the syllabus today, I was really enthused about the possibility of learning in a way that I haven't before. I got inspired by the thought of being able to critically examine things, and by the possibility of becoming an expert in the Social Work field that could truly make the difference I've been yearning to make in my 9 - 5s for the past five years. I grew thrilled by the vision of being able to sit at the head of a class someday with the privilege of educating others. I am definitely back in the game ... AND I'M READY!
My notes for the day:
Remember who I am, and WHOSE I AM!
This is not about letter grades and people pleasing, this is about personal, intellectual, and professional growth BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY!
I can create the possibility of greatness and just BE.
Take care of myself mentally, physically, and spiritually!
Believe in the power of my voice and know that I have something to say.
I AM A POWERFUL CONTRIBUTION!
Let's get it on!
Stay tuned....
Oh, btw - don't look for a grammatically perfect blog. This is my free space to just be self-expressed, so ... don't judge me. I'll get enough of that in school!
Thanks!
Smooches
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