Family Reunion: You Might Know Where You've Been, But Don't Always Expect it To Be the Same When You Return

Last weekend I attended a mini family reunion with relatives from my dad's side. My little sister traveled up from Charlotte and we packed into my cousin's car and headed towards Baltimore for part one of the festivities. Family members from the Henderson branch of the crew planned to gather at The National Great Blacks in Wax Museum before heading to the planned barbecue. As we approached the old corner building, I had a nostalgic reaction to my surroundings; I recalled taking a trip to this museum during my childhood. While waiting in the lobby for the remainder of the family to arrive, I anticipated that the museum experience would feel quite familiar in spite of the length of time since my former visit.

Once we paid and commenced the tour, with uncles, aunt, and cousins in tow, it wasn't minutes before I realized that this experience would truly be like the first time. The museum guide started us off with a briefing about the history and intent of the museum, and introduced us to the first items in the exhibit. As he pointed to the wax-figured replicas of slaves being force-fed and brutally abused it was as if the emotional response that welled up inside of me gave life to the images I witnessed...And then we walked onto the ship. Stepping down into the lower deck, my body recalled my experience as a cast member in the MAAFA; as I walked forward I could literally hear the rattle of chains and echo of the tour guide's reminder that our ancestors endured anywhere from 45-60 days of this barbaric torture.

I proceeded through this experience with an attention I don't recall paying to any other museum experience I've had in my life. Being there with family members of different generations made it that much more significant. I watched my older cousin carefully teaching her 6 year old daughter about the meaning of each exhibit, from the middle passage, through lynching, through our contributions to civil rights, our artistry, our entrepreneurial accomplishments, our determination to survive. My uncles followed us closely through the museum and gave life and meaning to what we witnessed in a different way; for many of the items and figures that we saw, they had personal stories to share about their, and my dad's, lived experiences from childhood. Uncle Jim talked with us about the days when they earned meager wages from arduous work picking cotton; it was beautiful to be among these important men in my life, and observe them not take lightly the responsibility of sharing history with us. They unapologetically displayed emotion while providing covering over us as we made our way through this gut-wrenching, provocative, and inspiring experience.

While I will definitely remember the fun of the more traditional reunion festivities that took place later in the day, my re-experience of the museum will really be etched in my mind. When I wish to complain, I will recall the images of those who endured the Middle Passage. When I start to lose motivation, I will remember the legacy of Cripple Caesar, a feet and hand amputee whose sheer determination helped him crawl his way to freedom after being captured several times while trying to escape. When I get hesitant about my call to leadership, I will remember Henry Box Brown who shipped himself from Virginia to Philadelphia in a box which he then used to speak out against slavery. And finally, in instances when my faith wavers, I will recall the image of the two school children who, in spite of being approached by a Klu Klux Klan member with a noose in hand, boldly declared "We are not Afraid".

When I finally returned home at about 2:15 the next morning, I lay in bed and reflected on the day with family. While I absolutely enjoyed the time with my relatives, at several points during the day I was saddened by the reminder of how much I miss my dad, one of my newer ancestors. When I turned over and realized that the normally empty space on the right hand side of my bed was occupied by my little sister, I didn't feel as alone as I might have, and I found some comfort in remembering that my dad was probably there with us all day long.

The Museum of Books!

Thankfully the Library of Congress is a pretty neat place to be. I've spent the last few days preparing for exams in this really cool, limited access book heaven! There's no walking through the stacks in this place; after you make it through airport quality security (I really had to take off my shoes and put them through the x-ray machine today), you've got a few steps before you can actually touch a book from this extensive collection. First, in a separate building, you must secure a top notch library reader id card at the end of a three step process. Once you've been cleared, you can walk through the tunnel to one of two other buildings where the main reading room awaits. Once here, however, you still can't put your fingers on a book until you've completed the request process; either online or in-person, you can fill out a form and pray for your books to actually be on the shelf and not at the desk of another library patron. After about 40-50 minutes, unless you overnight your order, the books can be delivered to you by authorized personnel. It's a pretty fancy ordeal...and a nice change of scenery for attacking the studies.

I've got less than three weeks to get ready to tell these professors everything I know from last year. My thing is, after the academic hazing yall already put me through the first-go-round, if I haven't qualified at this point, I don't know what to tell you. But, it is what it is, and I will be sitting for these grueling exams for five straight days beginning August 8th. Lawd help me!

Until then, I will stay prayed up and knee deep in work. I'll hopefully finish my summer internship on Monday, and begin a year long research position with one of my Professors on Tuesday. Time slows down for nothing!

Until next time, please keep me in your prayers. Before you know it, it will officially be the ribbon cutting for year two. Now only if the whole process could happen this fast!

Party's Over!

I feel like a seven year old being dragged out of an amusement park by big mama with the stern face that comes just before the whooppin; if I don't walk myself out of this park right now and head for the car, I got another thing coming! For the past few months, I've been enjoying a little bit of the ride of summer. I had the honor of going home to cheer on my nieces for their 5th grade graduation, and I got to be there when they returned from Junior prom in their little pink and blue flowered dresses, exhausted from all the excitement, and bubbling with all the stories of who didn't want to dance with whom...Priceless!

Dispersed throughout my time of employment at YSA, I got to attend flea markets with co-workers and explore parts of DC where I'd never ventured. In my discussions with fellow employees, I even learned of an easy way to get to travel to Frederiksburg, VA where my cousin resides. Thanks to this lead, I got to make my way to a Fourth of July celebration with family. All packed into a big, beautiful home, family members from as far south as Savannah and north as Upstate, New York, gathered for birthday cake, bbq, bowling, fireworks (it wasn't us ;)), neighborhood walks (or neighborhood run to avoid being fried by the looming lightning and thunderstorm), sing-a-longs, Walmart shopping (my favorite past-time with my Aunt Kim) and simply the pleasure of each others company (without there being a funeral!).

And then last week, my final scheduled summer attraction, the beautiful wedding of two of my college friends. After scurrying around for months trying to take care of bridesmaid duties, on July 9, 2011, I got to get all made up and participate in one of the most exciting days of a woman's life. From the bachelorette party (;)), to the church, to the panoramic view that enveloped the reception venue, I had a magical time. This mini reunion brought together most of my girls in support of a really beautiful bride and groom!

As I walked away from the photobooth, dance floor, and Wes crew, with my black cake party bag in hand, I slowly felt an eerie sadness in the midst of all the precious excitement. The lights were going out on the biggest ride in the park; it was time to start preparing for my return to all things school related.

In a matter of weeks, I will sit for my week-long qualifying exams. Yesterday, as I took the all too familiar ride to campus for the first time in months, I slowly felt an allergic reaction. Everything inside of me wanted to kick and scream and avoid the unavoidable, but I made my way to the library and began what will be an intense ride to victory.

I was blessed to be able to look back over the past few months and enjoy the memories of good times, good news, and many blessings. On my prayer altar right now I truly surrender worry, anxiety, and fear; I pray for God's covering over my family, friends, those loved ones who need healing and opportunities to help get through some very challenging times, and those like me everywhere who are working towards realizing some dream of their own. I pray a special prayer for my cohort and all that is in store for us with this upcoming year; I pray for news of full funding and to hear that I've received the Minority Fellowship in September. I simply thank God in advance for the way that things are already in divine, right order before I even ask.

As the lights dim on "vacation", I welcome this opportunity to get one step closer to finishing what I've started. I will walk bravely into this phase of my journey, knowing confidently that God didn't bring me this far to leave me.

#letsgetit